For the past few months I have been avidly following the blog of Clara Hinton – Married to a Pedophile. And although I have never met Clara in person, I am so in awe and inspired by her courage and spirit. She is also an amazing mother to eleven children – her son Chris, described her as a saint! She also has lots more grand children. Over the years, Clara suffered terrible psychological abuse at the hands of her preacher/pedophile husband, John. At the same time, he led a secret life which involved sexually abusing children in his parish. Clara’s abuse lasted for around 40 years until she plucked up the courage to leave. Of course that was not the end of the story because controlling, abusive men never just let their wives walk away peacefully or seek a win: win compromise. They just can’t do it and it is really because they are sick and need help! But due to the very nature of this illness, they won’t admit to themselves that they need help and continue to turn on others, usually those who are closest to them.
Clara’s husband was a well respected Preacher and pillar of the society, and no-one initially could believe that he was capable of such hideous behaviour, as his public persona was totally different to his secret, dark side.
Here is the link to Clara’s blog: http://findingahealingplace.wordpress.com
I urge everyone to read Clara’s blog for her own in-depth account. Thankfully, Clara’s husband is safely behind bars now for abusing children so the children are now safe from him. Clara’s family really are an inspiration to society because of their strength of spirit and authenticity. They are now left picking up the pieces of the devastation that has been left behind, but they are doing so in such a dignified and sophisticated manner. Clara & her son Chris’ authenticity have inspired me to try do the same when faced with a really difficult life situation.
As you can see, this story has really got my attention and resonates often with me in a very personal way, as I too was married to a psychologically abusive man. Although thankfuly he is not a pedophile, he is however a deeply damaged person who uses control, manipulation and threats to try and keep his weird and warped agenda together. After seeking the advice of experts, I now believe that he suffers from Narcissistic Personality Disorder. Like Clara’s husband John, in public my husband could not be more charming, charismatic and helpful. But look a little more closely and there are many red flags which should warn others of such dangerous personalities. This blog is really difficult for me to write as it brings up lots of emotional pain to the surface. But if my story, like Clara’s can help and educate other young men and women about the signs, then hopefully it will help people avoid or be able to get out of these highly damaging relationships much sooner than Clara and I were able to. We all deserve to live free and authentic lives, so trust your vibes people!